Mood:  sad

I just have to get this off my stress before it goes to my head and make things more difficult than it has to be. I was firstly tempted to break-up with Rayshawn when he came walking up with Mia and walked off with her. But then it got worst as I talked to his little sister and she told me all this stuff about him saying this girl named Katrina being his main girl and all the other girls were just his hoes!! She also said some other stuff that I can't even think of at the moment! But when I saw him I just lokked at im and he asked why was I looking like that but I didn't say anything then he walked up to me and grabbed my hand o I told him to let me go but he wouldn't until I told him why he should so I said it was over and he asked why and I was like because he has another girl and that he was wasting my time and he was like he don't have no other girl and I was like I know you do and her name starts with a C or K and he was like Katrina??I was like yeah if that's her name and then he said he don't go with her and he hates her. The Demarkis walked up so we walked off and talked then I went home and then to Vale car and read my book and called Chardai and C.J. Then I sat on my porch and read the book then I tried to go play basketball and Rayshawn followed me and knocked the ball out of my hand and when I tried to walk away he grabbed me and held me and was saying alot of stuff like I can't break up with him over her and that she's a bitch and that he wouldn't do me like that and that I am his only girl and a bunch of stuff like that then he was trying to kiss all on me but I wouldn't The at like 12:00a.m my mom said it was time for me to come in because it was getting late then I told him to walk me to my door and so he did and had his arm around my shoulder and when we got to my house he said that he would never do me like that and that he really likes me and asked for me to call him in 15 minutes....so I called him but his sister said he wasn't home but I guess we can talk about it tomorrow.

~Calm~

Princess

Mood:  a-ok

It's about time I write about how my days went now because all I been writing about lately is me and Rayshawn although he is always included in my day! Well I woke up late at 4:00 p.m when I suppose to had got up at 2:00 p.m so that me and Chardai can hang out. But then I got dressed and read my book The Twisted Window and talked to Demarkis for a little bit.The I got on the computer and Lanica,Kijuanna, and Brainna came over so I went outside to talk to them for about 20 minutes just joking around.Then I got back on the computer and then went outside to talk to Rayshawn then he went to Matthew's house so I got on the phone to talk to Tiara but she had school so I called Malcolm and we talked for awhile until Rayshawn walked up playing and hung up on him.Well to shorten this up I stayed outside with Rayshawn until 12:00a.m then when I got in the house I ate a pizza puff and got on the computer and Rayshawn called me and we talked for about an our and he got sleepy so I said I will go to his house tomorrow at 4:30 p.m.Then I called Kabil and we talked for some time until the hpone hung up on him because today it got cut of...I know that so boogish. Oh yeah, C.J called me but I hung up on him I am like so over him no more tears coming from my eyes to cry over him...I am better than that.But now I am IMing Dari

~Doing Better Now~

Princess

Mood:  surprised

Well I talked to Rayshawn and so we were outside until 12:25 because that's when my mom came and told me to come in. We kissed all and he kissed me on my hand,cheek,lips,and neck!! He was sitting on my lap and was trying to kiss all on my cheek and neck so I told him to sit next to me and that's when we were kissing each other. When he left I told him to call me and when we were talking he told me that he loves me and that I'm all he got I was so shocked but yet kind of disappointed because I sort of don't believe him it's too early for all this and he said that he thinks I am perfect but I am not going to jump heads over heals about this because he maybe just trying to get in my head. I think he may be that psycho type that says if it aint him I'm with than there's nobody else and try to hurt me when I try to break up with him,I get this thought because he said that there is no breaking up with him and that we are going to be together forever honestly I think he obsessed and insane, I will be scared when the time comes to break up.

~So Shocked~

Princess

Mood:  sad

I aint got nothing to say to Rayshawn because he came walking down the street with Mia from the park and my family was all right there and so they looking like Me-Me aint that your boyfriend and I found that so disrespectful. Who ever said that you get out what you put in is so wrong because I put my all into this and look what I get back!! Maybe being single is the best way to go about this whole situation because I don't want to go any further with Rayshawn only to get hurt more than I am hurting now,so I should just leave it alone for the time being!Like some say only time can heal the pain...to clarify this all I am not hurting that he was with another girl,it's just that my family was there to watch it all. Maybe I am just taking this more seriously than it really is,or am I?? I really don't know,only time will tell!!

~Not So Good~

Princess

Well let me see...I don't know where I last left off at so let me write what I think I left off at...well  I go with Rayshawn now because I decided to give him a chance and all...we hooked up over the phone,he asked will I be his girl so I said I guess and then he asked what did that mean and so I said yes and that's how we hooked up and we stayed on the phone all that night.Yesterday I went to the libraray with Chardai, Karen, Demakis, Kelsey, and Rayshawn.When we got on the block Rayshawn went down the street and I went in the house then came back out with Rayshawn until 12:30...that's what happened yesterday. Today I went to the park with Rayshawn and then I sat in Mrs.Collier car and read this book and then went to go eat and went back and was with Rayshawn until 12:30....and now it's 2:26 and on the phone with Chardai....that's all!!!

~Doing good~

Princess

Mood:  d'oh

Well I didn't get the chance to tell Rayshawn how I felt because I didn't see him today. But I am hoping that I see him tomorrow and that he walks me to the library so we can talk and all and be alone,hopefuly that works out as planned but if that doesn't work out then I will find out another way t go about it.

~Hopeful~

Princess

Mood:  flirty

Today was an interesting day.Dee-Dee was barbequing and I was playing basketball and I was with Rayshawn.But my mom and Dee-Dee was making me mad when they were questioning Rayshawn it was embarrassing. But then we talked and he left with Lydell to go somewhere so I came in the house to eat some chicken and it was raining so they came back on my porch so I went out there to talk to him.So we were talking and I sat down in the chair and so he said that he wanted to sit too and so I scooted over and he knocked me off it and told me to sit on his lap so I did for about 5 minutes. Then I got up and so did he so I sat in the chair and he sat on my lap this time and at first we were staring at eac other then he bit me o my cheek so I tried to bite him back but we whind up kissing and then after we were done I bit him back on his cheek.Then I showed him the hickey he gave me the other day and he started to suck on my neck again but I pushed him away then he kissed me on my cheek like 3 times and sucked it then we kissed again for like 5 minutes~that kiss was banging~but then i gave him a hug goodbye!!But when I got in the house I looked at the mirror and now I have another hickey on my neck and plus one on my left cheek!!!I am so in trouble!!!

~So mad~

Princess

Mood:  irritated

I just want to take the time out to not write about what I did today and just say what's from my heart! I honestly think that life is too short so I should just be with the person that makes me happy and Gerald just isn't making me happy right about now.What is the point of going with a person you never see or talk to when there is another person that you can see everyday and talk to everyday!!There isn't no point in that??I want more than just a weekend boyfriend, I want an all-around boyfriend...not just one that I see only on Friday's and Saturday's!! And every weekend isn't even promised that I'll see him so I just can't do it anymore because the last thing I said that I ever wanted was a long distance relationship and that's the reason I broke up with my last boyfriend and I don't want to just hop back into another one!Besides me and Gerald only has been a couple for 2 or 3 weks so it's not like we really got into anything serious so if I was to quit him for Rayshawn that wouldn't be real bad because he maybe isn't even really stunting me like that and I get the feeling that must not want to be with me if he never comes to see me. If there was a way I could go out west to see him,I would and there's no doubt about it but it's just too complicating.But I can't always get what I want and what I want isn't always what should be because maybe I am getting the wrong impression of Rayshawn thinking that he probably is exactly who I should be with...maybe I should think more about it.

~Just So Frustrated~

Princess